"When was the last time you made a new friend? Or grabbed an early morning cup of coffee with an old friend? A recent study found that when women have children, they drastically reduce the amount of time they spend with their friends -- barely five hours each week, down from 14 hours a week before having a child. And yet friendships are vital to our health and our happiness." --Parents Magazine
Since I don't have children, I'm the friend on the other side. I'm not at home cuddling a new baby, I'm just spending more time alone reading or watching t.v. This year, 3 of my friends are having babies so I've been thinking a lot about my friendships. I've had to make new friend groups over the years as different circles of friends ebbed and flowed with new jobs, new school situations and new babies at home. I love my well-established friendships and I'm guilty of taking them for granted. I've got my book club group, we get together once a month (twice if we have something fun planned). Most of the gals in that group do not have children, but a couple of them do. The mothers definitely have a harder time making it to every single meeting as sporting events and sick kids keep them at home. Since we have been meeting for almost 5 years, we have lots to talk about with art and books and films. I've got my cooking clique group. A friend circle that I'm part of, but my function is the younger, hip friend who doesn't have kids...and the rest of them have 3-4 children aging from 5-19 years old. We get together about once every six weeks for dinner and maybe a girl's weekend once a year. We talk about marriage and savings and vacations. I've got my teacher friends. One group is made up of women who are either not mothers or have grown children so they have more freedom. We get together once every 3 months or so (if we are lucky). The other group of art teacher friends all have children of various ages and and we only get together about twice a year. We all have a lot in common with our careers so we always have tons to talk about. And then there are teacher friends that I treasure and value and respect, be almost never get together because we have grown apart. Then I have my 'circle' friends. This is the group that I go to concerts, and actually go on vacations with....its the group that is popping out babies left and right. Last year, we all went to Mexico, we saw Justin Timberlake in concert and we got henna tattoos together. They are the girls enjoy spa nights during our annual girls' weekend and they have seen me at my best and my worst. All of them are married to a group of guys that went to high school together so we do a lot of couples activities together. Sometimes, I feel like I have so many friends that I don't spend enough time with the ones that are the most special to me and then I feel guilty when I make a new friend...because I'm more likely to ask my new friend to go do stuff while my other friends are out of the loop. I guess I'm lucky that I have so many friends, but I don't have a best friend. I don't like feeling that close to someone. I don't really want someone (besides my husband) to know everything about me. I'm to guarded with my emotions and I don't like to open up very often. I've been thinking that it might be time to attempt to make a few new friends. My class at MSSU and my new job have given me many opportunities to make new friends, but making a new friend is really hard. I don't want to come across as needy or annoying. Making a new friend at work is really tricky as people have their established friend groups and its hard to break into that. I'm open to new friendships and inviting new people into my circle. So that is one of my goals for this year. To make a new friend or two that I can have a laugh with and meet for dinner and just talk.
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Mrs. Mitchell
This is my 'slice of life' blog. Archives
March 2020
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